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Hello :)

You can come into our store at

6948 Almaden Expy, San Jose, CA 95120

Store Hours:

M-F: 7am-8pm

SAT: 8AM-5PM

Sun: Closed

Thank you for reaching out.

 

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bevy blog

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Start back at one

Yesie Chang

'Kiss Me' - Sixpence None the Richer

'Edelweiss' - Sound of Music

'Best Friend' - Jason Mraz

'Back At One' - Brian McKnight

It's been a little over a year since I've learned how to play the guitar and other than those Korean dramas, practicing guitar takes most of my free time. I can only play in the key of E and G... so to say that my guitar skills are 'limited' is an understatement. Surprising though, just how many songs I can squeeze into these two keys. Surprising just how low or high I'm willing to sing to stick to these parameters. Sometimes a caveman growl or a squeaky airy whisper almost. If you can imagine just how low, just how high. All so I don't have to learn how to play the F chord.

Bashfully, I've been curating a 'someday-one-day busking playlist' of songs I can play comfortably. I still can't play faster songs. I trip up on the beat and loose rhythm big time once the tempo passes anything faster than a brisk morning walk. No running, not just yet. Maybe some skipping ;) 

Each of those songs draw out memories and special sentiments, from 'She's All That' to the rolling hills of Austria. And who doesn't love Brian McKnight? I imagine his handsome self walking onto the stage of a PBS David Foster special. Smiling his white smile as his kind eyes look at me, telling me I'm his dream come true ~oo~oooo. Such feelz <3

As I spend those nights playing and singing, I'm interested in how some things simply don't change. How much I love music and singing. How I'm much the same person as I've always been. Easy to please yet reliably needy. How family is important as ever and God is faithful still. 

In my mind, I see the trajectory of my life move in circles. Sometimes they are big circles, taking a long time to connect at the starting point. Some are smaller with a faster return home. For Brian McKnight, ONE starts with a dream come true. And today I wonder, how long it takes to find the way back to that first confession. After those tiresome moments of paying the bills, fighting through shadows and scars, picking up the kids from soccer, basketball, synchronized swimming. How reliably can Brian find himself proclaiming that all this is a dream come true? Can Mr. McKnight find his way to starting back at one when life carries past a 4 minute song? Can I?

For me, these past few years have been filled with a lot of guilt and shame. Guilt, knowing how far I am from that first confession. Because my heart, thoughts, actions, constantly stray from faithfulness. Shame, feeling like I'll never get things right. That my autopilot is locked in selfishness and all those things... all those things I said and felt, were untrue. 

Somewhere in my early twenties, I said a lot of things. That families have to change. That we have to grow in compassion and change our lifestyles to incorporate the marginalized. That farmers matter and the dinner table matters. I heard a calling to the common household in my neighborhood and I set my heart and life to committing to this change. Among all the things I said, my heart is most sorry and tender to my bold claims of love to my God.

In the quiet of my room I confess with my lips, "Lord, I love you. You are my good Father. I no longer live but you live through me." On good days, maybe half a day passes by before bitterness starts to creep in. Accusatory words toward God and hateful thoughts start to lay heavy upon my chest. The only sword out of the thick is God's Word's to my heart. 'The Lord your God is in your midst, a mighty one who will save.' But then there's those nights when I simply yell at God that I've had enough. I tell him to back off. All of this is too hard and I hate life. I stay angry at Him, waiting for some kind of payment for His 'bad behavior' of not giving me the life I desire. "Make me feel better, God. Make my life better." I say. 

Then while driving to the farms, I look up at the sky and hear Him say, "Yesie, I am pleased with you. You make me happy and I love you. I died to take care of you. Trust in me. I rose from the grave. I have the power to redeem anything." Such ridiculous words. Such powerful words that stop my self-protecting and humble me to come to God as a child in need of her Father. 

All these things I thought and said, as I started the work of trying to live it in my life, I am realizing these truths can only become a reality through the power of the Holy Spirit. I find that the only way back is not through my efforts but through confessing that I can't do it. I can't bring about change in families. Unless from God, my compassion for the marginalized is simply a way to feel better about myself. I don't know how to love my neighbors as they need. I do not love God as He deserves. 

And yet...I confess!

I confess with my mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in my heart that God raised Him from the dead. Because in this journey of finding my way back, my life becomes a testimony to the glory of God as He presses in the gospel into my daily living. That no matter how far I wander, there is God who is always leading me back to that first confession. The Hound of Heaven will do whatever it takes.

I am weak and prone to stray. But God is strong and will always bring me back. 

He is the One who wills me to start back at One.

He is more than a dream come true. He is flesh and bones that I could never fathom with human creativity. He is the one who saves me from myself and strengthens me to live out His calling over my life. 

And today, as weak and broken as this confession may be... I love you Lord. Thank you. My words and life are not enough. Yet You are much more than enough. You complete every incomplete circle. You bring us back through loving kindness and I am amazed. May I find You more and more beautiful as each dawn awakens. May You be the New Song on my heart and arm I strum all my days. Thank you, Lord. Thank you... :')

A crush and a couple <3

Yesie Chang

Among the farming circle floats around a couple key gatherings throughout the calendar year that scratch our farmer-geek-itch. The Santa Rosa Heirloom Expo, the annual EcoFarm Conference, such are a different kind of big and special. There’s rarely an audience for our farming jibber jabber. Like the benefits of no-till farming in sequestering soil fertility while building a path for diversifying our ecosystems. Or the real struggle in successfully translating a farmer dream into a farmer business where our passion for growing good food meets economic stability. The big and special comes from the fact that all these people from all over the globe are working towards the same vision: A better quality of life for humanity through revolutionizing our food system. Reflecting, I could sum up EcoFarm as a time and place where compassion and care is multiplied.

Among the crush and the couple, I don’t know which encounter I am more excited to share about. The couple, they were so lovely. The crush, well, he was beautiful.

To start off, I will begin with lunch! I met up with Kathy, who farms our beef from Left Coast GrassFed, in front of the dining hall. She was the one who suggested I attend the EcoFarm Conference. The staff at the conference grounds were exceptionally kind and efficient, directing us to each round table big enough to seat 12 people at a time. A woman a bit past my parents’ age was directed to sit next to me and as we settled in, I introduced myself. “Hello! My name is Yesie.” “Hello, nice to meet you. My name is Jeanne.”

“Are you a farmer?” This was a good assumption to make. Most of the people at EcoFarm are farmers. Reckon.

“No, my husband is the farmer.”

“What kind of farming do you do?”

“We own a small dairy farm in Petaluma.”

“Oh, that’s awesome!”

Such our mini introduction ended. Our lunch menu was a choice between veggie or chicken mole. As I readied myself to eat, Kathy pointed to the sour cream on our table and looked up at Jeanne,

“Jeanne, hey~~”

And Jeanne looked up, responding merrily, “Yes, I’m Hungarian American and I pushed my husband to make our line of sour cream. We need our sour cream.”

My curiosity peaked.

Soon after her husband sat next to Jeanne.

These two are Mr. and Mrs. Straus. Founders of Straus Family Creamery.

For me, I was in shock the first couple tens of minutes as we continued to eat, meaning I was star-struck for all of lunch. How could they be so normal? So humble? So kind and warm? So…cute?

Jeanne went on describing her husband as a mad scientist, and I could tell. Even while we conversed, he was physically present but not 100% there...I could see the cogs in his mind turning as he invented and readjusted his new amazing dairy good for us lucky Bay Area people to enjoy. Albert is a farm geek and eloquence is not his forte. Yet such genuine care for what Bevy is doing and encouragement exuded from the couple. As we parted after we had our fill, Albert stopped me,

“Yesie. I know it’s in here somewhere.”

Such intent as he flipped, flopped, turned all his pockets out. I was expecting lint to soon appear.

“Ah, here it is.”

He handed me his card, me feeling so apologetic for not even owning a business card.

“I know we go through distributors and such but if you have anything I can help you with, please don’t hesitate to contact me.”

“Thank you so much. If you have any suggestions or advice, we are always open and wanting to learn more.”

It was time to go. I wanted to give this father figure a hug.

Sensing my lingering, with such warmth, “Yesie, I’ll give you a hug.”

You can probably feel how happy I was. How cared for I felt by this family.

 

On another enjoyable thread, to summarize my rendezvous with the EcoFarm crush, he was beautiful, I was awkward, that was that. We met at the info booth for the new organic certification non-profit. He also works for Patagonia Provisions, which is Patagonia’s line of ethical food aimed mostly for backpackers and adventure folks. Although it’s sad that we probably won’t cross paths again unless I decide to bring in buffalo jerky to Bevy, those butterflies were a nice surprise. A reminder that I’m wanting to fall in love, sometime, maybe soon.

 

All this story telling and sharing my moments is necessary. The biggest reason being that I want you to have a window into the farmer community. We carry a similar philosophy and vision to influence our food system where one day, harmful food has no place on our dinner tables. Where no more farmers are losing pride in their noble occupation. We are diligently working towards this dream but the costs are real, with the promise of pain in each bend of our path.

Yet we are strong, together. The way we survive through harsh realities is by these loving and caring encounters with rewards that are impossible to quantify. The full assurance that people, intelligent, bright, compassionate people, are behind you rooting for those daily victories in our everyday warzones. As a collective, we are doing good together for the masses.

Often times, I say to myself that every person just needs these four things: Food on the table, a roof over head, clothes on back, and a loving community. How full is your life? How are we doing, as the human race, at providing these things for ourselves and for other people?

 

Do you have food on your table? Say thanks.

Do you have a roof over your head? Say thanks.

Do you have clothes on your back? Say thanks.

Do you have a loving community? Say thanks.

 

Today, let’s join in with our farmers in their daily wrestling:

What will it take for more people to have what they need?

 

This is the good food revolution. I assure you, there’s no way to be one toe in. But I promise, this life is one of love, one of sharing, one of community and every moment is worth the good we’re partaking.

Let’s do this! Together, in Jesus’ Name!

 

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me plus you

Yesie Chang

For many of you who know me, also know Bevy.

Bevy is my produce store that has been in the works for the past year and a half. I remember going to Korea as my last hurrah, telling my grandma, uncles and aunts that I'm going to open up a produce store! At the time, what a relief! Quitting 4 part-time jobs and mounted up with excitement at a plunge into realizing long-carried dreams.

As weeks turned into months, and moons continued to wax and wane, things changed. Bevy was my everything, my complete horizon and identity. But in the process of opening this store, my tight grip over Bevy became painfully unsustainable in the consistent failures I had to face. Regarding life circumstances as well as my own weak abilities. I started to look around, see if there was anyone hurting as much as me. As poor in spirit as myself. To my surprise, there was a lot more people than I could account for.

During the year and half delay, my heart began to soften towards the blunt fact that in life, there are and will be many trials and hardships. Roadblocks are a promise, not a surprise. Undeserved pain is secured, not something to be avoided. At least when my world becomes me plus you. When my world is about "us".


The strains of living a life completely accountable for myself can be deep, yet manageable...I imagine. Working on Bevy however, opened my eyes to the illusion of aloneness. I experienced in a very painful way that for every "us" I'm a part of, we all hurt for all of our failures.

As my mistakes started causing real consequences in other people's lives, and theirs as well for me, the grief was overwhelming. Who knew my inner emotional middle-school kid was still alive? Thankfully, it was these very people who taught me that they are willing to stick around. That being happy together, with me, is more important than being happy, without me.

"Us" used to scare me because it means collective accountability. It means that as a farmer, I am responsible for the food that is killing people and our soil. As a consumer, I am a part of our food system that exploits workers and exacerbates world hunger. The reality of living life here in America, in the social economic culture I live in, usually means that someone else is paying for my selfishness. We expense the poor for our comforts as they absorb undeserved injustice and pain. They carry the weight to service our needs yet in so many ways, do we even remember that they exist? Am I willing to incorporate the weak and humble into my "us"?

I look on my life, my privilege, and see that I have only received the best. The best kind of farmers who care for people and our land. Resourceful parents who don't waste a square of toilet paper nor a grain of rice. Friends who model with their lives what it means to feed the hungry and heal the broken.

How can I be accountable for my family, for my nation, for ultimately humanity?

In the Bible, God says that he remembers the least of these. I know that's why he has created my farmers, my family, my friends. They are living examples of what it means to take up responsibility for mankind. To painfully absorb the consequences of others' mistakes while joyfully investing in a less evil, more good place, for someone, anyone, some time, along the way. So we can all be "us" together and ultimately the whole will be greater than the parts.

Us farmers.

Us women.

Us millennials.

Us Korean Americans.

Us Christians.

Us humans.

In each, we each carry our successes and our burdens. The good and bad connotation. The consequences of all our actions but that's what it means to be "us".

Yet still, the obstacle of being together is a challenge worth facing. I believe that in our daily faithfulness, the broken will be healed and the lost will be saved. I believe that all this pain and strife will win us a greater joy and glory ever fathomed. The hard times are hard but I know that ultimately, we are blessed to be in this together.

Me plus you can be difficult, but thank you for walking with me. Carrying my dragging, unwilling feet at times. I love love love this journey with you. In being a farmer, in being a person of faith, and foremost in being simply human in need of God's infinite grace and eternal love.

And for that random person who is persevering today, thank you. What you do matters and please keep fighting for us.